So ~1984 a group by the name of Whodini came out with a song titled Friends...
Here's a bit of that song:
Friends
How many of us have them?
Friends
Ones we can depend on
Friends
How many of us have them?
Friends
Before we go any further, lets be
Friends
Is a wordwe use everyday
Most the time we use it in the wrong way
Now you can look the word up, again and again
But the dictionary doesn't know the meaning of friends
And if you ask me, you know, I couldn't be much help
Because a friend is somebody you judge for yourself
Some are ok, and they treat you real cool
But some mistake kindness for being a fool
We like to be with some because they're funny
Others come around when they need some money
Some you grew up with around the way
And you're still real close to this very day
Homeboys through the summer, winter, spring and fall
and then there's some we wish we never knew at all
And this list goes on, again and again
But these are the people we call friends
In recent weeks and days I've had to think a lot about these people in my life that I call my friends. Is this just easier to say then to call someone an associate or an acquaintance? Is it wrong when you consider someone your friend and they do something that is not friend like? Shouldn't friends be the ones you trust with your life and deepest secrets? Is it okay for them to constantly bail on you and your plans when you never bail on them? Since when is there a double standard on friendships?
The majority of these people I call friends should not have that title. They are not worthy of it. But what about me? I feel like I totally deserve that title to each and everyone of them. I'm 27 not 17 and so I'm over the high school type talking. I'm tired of the "Guess what such and such told me but don't tell anyone." OVER IT! I'm tired of the making plans and then 5 mins before meeting up or at least 30 mins after the fact bailing with some lame excuse as to why you can't go after plans have been made for a while. OVER IT! Sorry but I don't like to waste my money or time. I'm in school and I work...so in essence my time is precious to me. My goal is to finish school in the next 2 years while I'm also working full time...sorry if that doesn't sync up with your life. I'm sorry all you want to do is party and drink...that's your life, but it's not mine. I have responsibilities and goals....either get on the same page and respect me like I respect you are please part ways because I don't have time for people keeping me from my dreams.
I should have done this at the beginning of the year, but I think I might take a look at that friend list and cut it down.
Friends....How many of us have them?
I think that a friend is someone who is there for you through thick and thin. People have different personality types and different values. So what it means to be a friend to one person is different for everone. I think that the golden rule applies to everyone, but esspecially to friends. I have been caught up with friends who are kind of flakey. If you continue to be friends with that person, meaning that they are not really doing anything bad enough to end the friendship, then you tend to treat them like they treat you. Hence, you become a flakey person as well. This is not really a good thing, but you justify it in your head. So really what does it mean to be a friend at that point? I think a true friend is someone who is compatible with you. Like a romantic relationship, some people get along and others don't. Sometimes for no obvious reason. Also, sometimes people who you thought were not very good friends are there for you when your "true" friends are not. So, in retrospect, I think that it is important to keep an open mind and be honest with yourself about who you allow to actually consider a friend.
ReplyDeleteWisedom: If you lend a friend money, and you never see that person again, it is money well spent.